1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Venting About Personal Issues: VAPI: SE: Note/Warning, Pages 1-3

by NightRaven

Warning.png VAPI: SE Pg.png VAPI: SE Pg.png VAPI: SE Pg.png
NightRaven Here are the first three pages, plus a note/warning. Remember, this only serves venting purposes. Nothing more.
And the art is comprised of quick sketches, almost. Don't expect it to be perfect.

This comic contains some things I've been hiding for a while.
Don't expect perfect happiness...

Thank you for even a glance, for it is still far more than I could expect or even hope for.

Also, since you probably can't read my awful handwriting:

Note/Warning:
"Hello, friends!
Just a quick note before you read this comic;
It is about me and my self-esteem issues. Don't expect bright, happy content. This comic is also a vent. I am NOT asking/begging for attention. This comic is also very personal!
Thank you!"

Page 1:
"In case you didn't know, I have
low self-esteem. In fact, I hate myself. Others do far better than I do, always: not because I want to be the absolute best, but because I want to actually be worth something.
I hate myself for my inability to be good, even remotely, at several things I should be. I hate myself for not being as good as others.
I want to be like others; to actually be worth something, to actually do something right, instead of being stuck in the body of an utter failure."

Page 2:
"I see myself as
far lower than others: that they are always better than me. No matter how much it hurts, I still follow under it. I feel worthless beyond my own belief: I hate myself for not being as good as everyone else.
I envy them."

Page 3:
"My goals are always so
far ahead of me. Every step I manage to climb up, the goal is always on top of the staircase. I try so desperately to reach them, but they're always so far ahead.
Why can't I catch up?"

The third page's background is intentionally not fully colored. Do take note of that.
Tags:
  1. Atsuko-Chan
    Atsuko-Chan
    I also had low self-esteem, but I have improved a lot. In my case I always tryied to hide it from others and even from myself. That's how I tryied to comfort myself: trying to spot good things about me.
    I still feel really empty inside, even when people tell me that my drawings are awesome, I hate my own drawings, and hate myself too. However I'm optimistic, so even when I think of give up on everything, or start spotting bad things, I think of it has something I can surpass, so I always try to make myself a awesome and wonderful person that other people can admire.
    Thanks to my friends I'm better, yet It still haunts me sometimes. I hope you can also surpass you self-esteem, let's both fight against it!!
    You're incredible, never give up on yourself. Dreams and goals aren't impossible, everything is possible. Surpass your self-esteem is also possible.
    Try to do something you still haven't done, like spotting good things, or improving at what you're bad at, or even try to don't care about what others say. Everyone is important and it has its own talent, everyone has a hidden talent. I hope that you someday can feel better too.
    Your art is beautiful, so try to imagine what kind of people you'll become if you keep drawing!! You're still young, there's still a lot of things to learn. I hope that someday you can surpass it. You can do things that can go far than you think!!♥ ♥
    Sep 24, 2017
    Mythicalis-Majora likes this.
  2. Twilight Nova
    Twilight Nova
    Ahhhh don't feel like everyone is better than you! You are not worthless and you are actually pretty freakin cool
    Your art is improving at a fast rate, (seriously it's getting better and better every time you post) and if you keep practicing, you'll keep improving. You just gotta keep doing your best and soon enough you'll look back and see how much you've improved and realize how far you've come
    You're still young, (i say though you're like a year younger than me XD) you don't have to be so hard on yourself! You're still growing and learning who you are and all that, and you don't have to compare yourself to others; they're all different people who've gone through different things, and maybe they were just born with amazing talents and never get the satisfaction of improving your skills and character
    Plus you're super nice and kind and overall a good person to talk to, you make me feel good about myself, and all you need is someone who does that to you! Encourages you to keep going and makes you feel good about yourself. (I might be one, but it's also good to surround yourself with people like that too) If you don't find someone, then be that person for yourself until you do! Just remember that you'll keep improving on everything as long as you practice and don't be too hard on yourself.
    Keep being you and you'll go far dude
    Sep 23, 2017
    Mythicalis-Majora likes this.
  3. Starry Phantump
    Starry Phantump
    Thank you :)
    Sep 20, 2017
    Mythicalis-Majora likes this.
  4. NightRaven
    NightRaven
    Thank you, @Starry Phantump ! I apologize for your loss: I hope you recover soon and to the best point possible!
    Also, nothing was offensive nor confusing towards me. ^^ Thank you for the support.
    Sep 19, 2017
    CosmicArt and Starry Phantump like this.
  5. Starry Phantump
    Starry Phantump
    I kinda know how you feel,after my sister died it took a toll on my personality and my self esteem,so I always try to act cheerful and express it to people to try and help with this sort of thing

    You can let these things out if you want to and it's good if this helps you deal with your low self-esteem and charms is probably a better place to talk about these things since it's nicer and people support you with things like this,while on sites like Reddit people would tell you to suck it up or just act rude to you

    (I'm sorry if this is confusing or offends you in any way,i honestly hope you can get over your self-esteem problem and am here to help you in any way I can)
    Sep 19, 2017
  6. Protactinium Nitrogen
    Protactinium Nitrogen
    Actually you should wait for two people to dislike it, I don't care that this is on this site so I don't count XD :p(sorry for commenting again)
    Sep 18, 2017
  7. NightRaven
    NightRaven
    Thank you for understanding, @CosmicArt ! ^^' I still apologize for any inconvenience.
    Sep 18, 2017
    CosmicArt likes this.
  8. Shrine
    Shrine
    I am not offended, sometimes people need to let this out, now that I think about it.
    Sep 18, 2017
    Mythicalis-Majora likes this.
  9. NightRaven
    NightRaven
    @CosmicArt and @EvangelinaOfTheEnder , just so you know, I will continue this comic, until a third person is somehow also annoyed/offended by this. Until then, I will continue this.
    If you dislike it, then (and I hate to sound rude) simply look past it.
    I'm under extreme pressure with this, so I felt I needed to express it in some way. I've vented before and never had an issue with it.
    However, if I find that a third person also disapproves of this in some way, then it will be discontinued— meaning that it'll still be up, but no longer uploaded upon.
    Sep 18, 2017
  10. Protactinium Nitrogen
    Protactinium Nitrogen
    There is no need to apologize, everyone needs to let some things out, and when they have no one to talk to they go online cause people online seem to care more then people in real life.
    Sep 18, 2017
  11. NightRaven
    NightRaven
    @EvangelinaOfTheEnder , again, I apologize...

    If this becomes an issue with anyone else, this entire thing will be removed and will not be mentioned again...
    Sep 18, 2017
    CosmicArt likes this.
  12. Protactinium Nitrogen
    Protactinium Nitrogen
    I kinda feel the same :/..... I could add you to my prayer list if you'd like.
    Sep 18, 2017
    CosmicArt likes this.
  13. NightRaven
    NightRaven
    @CosmicArt , I apologize if you see this as offensive, or dislike that this is here...
    I fear to say I have no where else to turn, and that the pressure I'm under is beyond what I'd imagined.

    But, I had a feeling someone would say something along these lines...
    I, again, apologize for any form of inconvenience towards you or anyone else.
    Sep 18, 2017
    CosmicArt likes this.
  14. Shrine
    Shrine
    'Charms isn't the place to talk about all this...
    Sep 17, 2017