Another year went by, and she was attending school with her brother as usual. However, something about her was visibly different, over time. She looked different. Disheveled. Strange. She looked at her classmates funny, smiled funny, talked funny, talked to herself a lot. Her brother was worried for her, especially when she’d respond to him by talking out to where nobody was before realizing he was there. She didn’t do any of her work in class. She would constantly leave class to use the bathroom.
The students rumored- she was crazy, she was possessed, she was just plain weird. They whispered about her. Many were scared of her, keeping their distance from her in fear that she'd set them on fire somehow. Her teachers first thought she was just going through a phase, until they began to pick up on especially worrying clues. Weird, troubling scrawling on her papers, as if other people were writing on it- people who didn’t exist. A scent of smoke drifting off of her ever so slightly every time she came back from the bathroom. More and more reports of things being burned in the trash cans and dumpster. More and more teachers coming to the lounge, and airing their confusion and fear of something happening with Blazz. A greater demand to keep an eye on her the next time she disappears from class, and to up security around bathrooms. And it all came to prove their paranoia right, when one day, the fire alarm went off.
The entire school was evacuated, and every student accounted for- except for one. A pair of a teacher and custodian ran back into the campus to find her, desperately shouting her name. They eventually did find her- standing in the middle of an empty classroom. And in front of her, piles and piles of paper, cardboard, pencils, garbage from assorted garbage cans- all piled up in the middle of the room. And completely sent up in a blaze. The little girl glanced back at the two adults with a proud smile.
“...It’s pretty.”
The police, the fire department, and emergency medical services all arrived on the scene shortly thereafter. While firefighters desperately tried to put out the fruits of her labor, the police began to interrogate her. She didn’t hate anyone in the school. She liked her teachers. She liked school more than being home. All answers that began to point to something. Investigations were launched, Blazz was sent in for a psych examination. The entire time, she mumbled, she glanced around, she fumbled for anything she knew was flammable. It was clear she was far worse than troubled. She was dangerous, and completely unstable.
An investigation took place at her house- and shortly thereafter, she and her brother were watching their parents walk out of their house in handcuffs, into a police car.
A few adult guardians reassured them to the best of their ability that they would be okay. They’d be going off to live with other people- not family. They didn’t have any family available. They were told to get their things, and be prepared to move. One of them looked Blazz in the eyes.
“You’re going to get help. Don’t you worry.”
Blazz wandered back into her house to gather up her stuff. A guardian went with her. She put all of her things in one big pile, then told the guardian she needed to use the bathroom. She went to use the bathroom, the guardian waited outside. And waited. And then began to smell smoke. A fire alarm suddenly went off, and he swiftly broke the bathroom door open. And there, in the middle of the bathtub and rapidly spreading around the room, was a fire sprouting from all of the flammable items in the bathroom. Blazz merely glanced over at her guardian with a smile.
“...I like this idea a lot more.”
Before anyone was able to stop her, the little pyromaniac took her favorite item- a lighter- and ran around, setting fire to all of the piles of flammable items she had created around the house. A fire extinguisher wasn’t going to help in time- she had doused the piles in gasoline she had siphoned from her parent’s cars. Everyone evacuated the house as quickly as possible, bringing Blazz along with them. The fire department had no chance to put out the fire before it engulfed the house, setting it up in a huge, magnificent blaze.
Even locked away in a police car, Blazz watched her house burn down with a wide, and proud, grin. She watched as her childhood burned to the ground in a storm of fire, a storm she started. Blazz, the little monster her parents had created, finally came around and destroyed everything they had. Destroyed her past, her history, and every last speck at her chance of a normal life.
And she was happy with it.
--
The Mordem Institution of the Mentally Unstable was a giant ward, for patients of all ages. An elderly complex, an adult complex, and a children’s complex. But Blazz had to be put in with the adults, due to the fact that there were no safe containments for her particular case in the children’s complex. The nurses and doctors knew of her as ‘the pyromaniac’ whose fireproofed cell sat snugly in the edges of the adult complex. There, she stayed, for many years. She was housed, fed, kept safe, talked to, and cared for. As strange as it was, she felt at home there. The other patients, those who could hold a conversation, were people she often conversed with.
She made many friends- mostly adults. Many made improvements, and she said goodbye as they were released. Many died, and she knew when they died because they left without saying goodbye. She went bowling, she went out into the yard, she had fun being a friend with people much, much older than her. Despite her being so young, she seemed to fit right in. She was a maniac, in many ways, but she was a joyful one.
Years went by, and treatment continued. Doctors tried many different methods of treatment, attempting to cure her of the many voices in her head, of soothing her obsession with fire. They only succeeded with one, in the end.
One day, Blazz was sitting alone in her cell, staring at a lit lighter she had asked one of her caretakers for. Said caretaker sat down on a chair outside her cell, watching her carefully. Blazz’s eyes never seemed to move from the fire, unlike their normal erratic darting around. Eventually, the caretaker spoke.
“Well, Blazz? How are you feeling?”
“I’m alright. Thanks.”
“Of course. Is the lighter helping?”
“Yeah, it is. Thanks, again.”
“Good. How about the medication we administered to you earlier? Are you feeling anything different?"
A beat of silence
“Not really.”
“Nothing at all? Any quieter up there?”
“...Well, it is. A little bit. But I don’t feel different.”
“You don’t? How so?”
“I feel like me. Like I always do. All those other things don’t really change who I am.”
“No, of course not. We’re just trying to see if we can help clear your head, not change who you are.”
“Could have fooled me.”
“...Pardon?”
“You all talk and act like you want to change me.”
“Well, no. We want to help you.”
“By changing me.”
“..Only if you want to.”
The now-young teen let out a sigh.
“I don’t want to change myself for anything.”
“Then you don’t have to. But I’m sure you’d love to be able to think clearly.”
“Well, yeah. I would.”
“Then that’s what we’re here to fix. You can tell what’s real and what isn’t, now, right?”
“..Yeah, better than before.”
“Good. Why don’t you look at me for a moment, and away from the fire?”
She didn’t look away. She just kept staring at it, one arm wrapped around her legs.
“The fire helps me get my thoughts together. Whenever I’m looking at it, nothing else seems to get in my head. Everything else kinda disappears. I don’t see anything else, I don’t hear anything else. Nothing real or fake matters anymore. It’s just the fire. It’s.. like it burns away all the chaos.”
“...Interesting.”
“I love it. It’s the only time I think clearly. Everything feels.. So clean. So smooth. So easy to understand. It’s like I’m opening up my mind again, burning a hole in it and letting all the bad thoughts out, and all the good thoughts in. The bad thoughts gunk up again after a while, but watching these just burns them all away.”
“But, along with everything else, right?”
“...Not everything. Just temporarily. The good things retreat from the fire. The bad things get burned by it. It’s like it’s molding me back into shape. Heating up the crucible, melting me down and reshaping me like a bent metal bar. I feel revitalized, rejuvenated. So much better, so much stronger. It’s mesmerizing. I can’t look away, I don’t want to look away.”
Eventually, she trailed off, and just continued to stare at the lighter. Her caretaker noticed this, and coughed to get her attention. She flinched, and glanced over at them.
“...Sorry.”
“It’s alright. I think I can visualize what you’re describing. It’s not quite just an escape to you, is it.”
“No, it’s way more than that.”
“Yes… Also, I noticed a lot of bigger words and fancy phrases in there that I’ve never heard you use before.”
“I was spending time in the library earlier.”
“You were? That’s not like you.”
“I wanted to see what it was like, and I felt like learning something I didn’t know before.”
“Is that so? You were never someone to feel like that.”
“I dunno. I guess I am changing.”
“All on your own. Change is up to you, not to us.”
“I know.”
Silence, as her caretaker glanced around the hall for a moment, and Blazz simply looked down at the extinguished lighter.
“...Here, you can have this back, now.”
“Actually, I think you can keep it. You seem to like it.”
She blinked, almost hesitantly continuing to hold it out to them.
“...Really? I can keep this?”
“Sure, sure. I don’t smoke anymore, anyway. I’ve been meaning to get rid of that for a long time. I think you’d appreciate it more than me. Just don’t burn it forever, it’ll run out eventually, and I don’t think I can get you replacements or refills in here.”
The girl turned her glance down at the extinguished lighter in her palm, as if she was trying to come up with what exactly to say.
“...Thanks. I.. I really appreciate it.”
“No problem. Just leave it in here when you go out for recreation. You know how we are about you burning the place down, right?”
“Right, right, I know. I will. I promise.”
“Thank you, Blazz.”
“...Yeah. No problem. ...Could.. I go visit the library again?”
“You want to, now?”
“Yeah. Before dinner.”
“Sure. Let’s go.”
The caretaker stood up and opened the cell, while Blazz glanced down at the lighter. She stared at it for a moment before setting it down over on her table. And with that, she turned and headed out the door, following her caretaker.
The students rumored- she was crazy, she was possessed, she was just plain weird. They whispered about her. Many were scared of her, keeping their distance from her in fear that she'd set them on fire somehow. Her teachers first thought she was just going through a phase, until they began to pick up on especially worrying clues. Weird, troubling scrawling on her papers, as if other people were writing on it- people who didn’t exist. A scent of smoke drifting off of her ever so slightly every time she came back from the bathroom. More and more reports of things being burned in the trash cans and dumpster. More and more teachers coming to the lounge, and airing their confusion and fear of something happening with Blazz. A greater demand to keep an eye on her the next time she disappears from class, and to up security around bathrooms. And it all came to prove their paranoia right, when one day, the fire alarm went off.
The entire school was evacuated, and every student accounted for- except for one. A pair of a teacher and custodian ran back into the campus to find her, desperately shouting her name. They eventually did find her- standing in the middle of an empty classroom. And in front of her, piles and piles of paper, cardboard, pencils, garbage from assorted garbage cans- all piled up in the middle of the room. And completely sent up in a blaze. The little girl glanced back at the two adults with a proud smile.
“...It’s pretty.”
The police, the fire department, and emergency medical services all arrived on the scene shortly thereafter. While firefighters desperately tried to put out the fruits of her labor, the police began to interrogate her. She didn’t hate anyone in the school. She liked her teachers. She liked school more than being home. All answers that began to point to something. Investigations were launched, Blazz was sent in for a psych examination. The entire time, she mumbled, she glanced around, she fumbled for anything she knew was flammable. It was clear she was far worse than troubled. She was dangerous, and completely unstable.
An investigation took place at her house- and shortly thereafter, she and her brother were watching their parents walk out of their house in handcuffs, into a police car.
A few adult guardians reassured them to the best of their ability that they would be okay. They’d be going off to live with other people- not family. They didn’t have any family available. They were told to get their things, and be prepared to move. One of them looked Blazz in the eyes.
“You’re going to get help. Don’t you worry.”
Blazz wandered back into her house to gather up her stuff. A guardian went with her. She put all of her things in one big pile, then told the guardian she needed to use the bathroom. She went to use the bathroom, the guardian waited outside. And waited. And then began to smell smoke. A fire alarm suddenly went off, and he swiftly broke the bathroom door open. And there, in the middle of the bathtub and rapidly spreading around the room, was a fire sprouting from all of the flammable items in the bathroom. Blazz merely glanced over at her guardian with a smile.
“...I like this idea a lot more.”
Before anyone was able to stop her, the little pyromaniac took her favorite item- a lighter- and ran around, setting fire to all of the piles of flammable items she had created around the house. A fire extinguisher wasn’t going to help in time- she had doused the piles in gasoline she had siphoned from her parent’s cars. Everyone evacuated the house as quickly as possible, bringing Blazz along with them. The fire department had no chance to put out the fire before it engulfed the house, setting it up in a huge, magnificent blaze.
Even locked away in a police car, Blazz watched her house burn down with a wide, and proud, grin. She watched as her childhood burned to the ground in a storm of fire, a storm she started. Blazz, the little monster her parents had created, finally came around and destroyed everything they had. Destroyed her past, her history, and every last speck at her chance of a normal life.
And she was happy with it.
--
The Mordem Institution of the Mentally Unstable was a giant ward, for patients of all ages. An elderly complex, an adult complex, and a children’s complex. But Blazz had to be put in with the adults, due to the fact that there were no safe containments for her particular case in the children’s complex. The nurses and doctors knew of her as ‘the pyromaniac’ whose fireproofed cell sat snugly in the edges of the adult complex. There, she stayed, for many years. She was housed, fed, kept safe, talked to, and cared for. As strange as it was, she felt at home there. The other patients, those who could hold a conversation, were people she often conversed with.
She made many friends- mostly adults. Many made improvements, and she said goodbye as they were released. Many died, and she knew when they died because they left without saying goodbye. She went bowling, she went out into the yard, she had fun being a friend with people much, much older than her. Despite her being so young, she seemed to fit right in. She was a maniac, in many ways, but she was a joyful one.
Years went by, and treatment continued. Doctors tried many different methods of treatment, attempting to cure her of the many voices in her head, of soothing her obsession with fire. They only succeeded with one, in the end.
One day, Blazz was sitting alone in her cell, staring at a lit lighter she had asked one of her caretakers for. Said caretaker sat down on a chair outside her cell, watching her carefully. Blazz’s eyes never seemed to move from the fire, unlike their normal erratic darting around. Eventually, the caretaker spoke.
“Well, Blazz? How are you feeling?”
“I’m alright. Thanks.”
“Of course. Is the lighter helping?”
“Yeah, it is. Thanks, again.”
“Good. How about the medication we administered to you earlier? Are you feeling anything different?"
A beat of silence
“Not really.”
“Nothing at all? Any quieter up there?”
“...Well, it is. A little bit. But I don’t feel different.”
“You don’t? How so?”
“I feel like me. Like I always do. All those other things don’t really change who I am.”
“No, of course not. We’re just trying to see if we can help clear your head, not change who you are.”
“Could have fooled me.”
“...Pardon?”
“You all talk and act like you want to change me.”
“Well, no. We want to help you.”
“By changing me.”
“..Only if you want to.”
The now-young teen let out a sigh.
“I don’t want to change myself for anything.”
“Then you don’t have to. But I’m sure you’d love to be able to think clearly.”
“Well, yeah. I would.”
“Then that’s what we’re here to fix. You can tell what’s real and what isn’t, now, right?”
“..Yeah, better than before.”
“Good. Why don’t you look at me for a moment, and away from the fire?”
She didn’t look away. She just kept staring at it, one arm wrapped around her legs.
“The fire helps me get my thoughts together. Whenever I’m looking at it, nothing else seems to get in my head. Everything else kinda disappears. I don’t see anything else, I don’t hear anything else. Nothing real or fake matters anymore. It’s just the fire. It’s.. like it burns away all the chaos.”
“...Interesting.”
“I love it. It’s the only time I think clearly. Everything feels.. So clean. So smooth. So easy to understand. It’s like I’m opening up my mind again, burning a hole in it and letting all the bad thoughts out, and all the good thoughts in. The bad thoughts gunk up again after a while, but watching these just burns them all away.”
“But, along with everything else, right?”
“...Not everything. Just temporarily. The good things retreat from the fire. The bad things get burned by it. It’s like it’s molding me back into shape. Heating up the crucible, melting me down and reshaping me like a bent metal bar. I feel revitalized, rejuvenated. So much better, so much stronger. It’s mesmerizing. I can’t look away, I don’t want to look away.”
Eventually, she trailed off, and just continued to stare at the lighter. Her caretaker noticed this, and coughed to get her attention. She flinched, and glanced over at them.
“...Sorry.”
“It’s alright. I think I can visualize what you’re describing. It’s not quite just an escape to you, is it.”
“No, it’s way more than that.”
“Yes… Also, I noticed a lot of bigger words and fancy phrases in there that I’ve never heard you use before.”
“I was spending time in the library earlier.”
“You were? That’s not like you.”
“I wanted to see what it was like, and I felt like learning something I didn’t know before.”
“Is that so? You were never someone to feel like that.”
“I dunno. I guess I am changing.”
“All on your own. Change is up to you, not to us.”
“I know.”
Silence, as her caretaker glanced around the hall for a moment, and Blazz simply looked down at the extinguished lighter.
“...Here, you can have this back, now.”
“Actually, I think you can keep it. You seem to like it.”
She blinked, almost hesitantly continuing to hold it out to them.
“...Really? I can keep this?”
“Sure, sure. I don’t smoke anymore, anyway. I’ve been meaning to get rid of that for a long time. I think you’d appreciate it more than me. Just don’t burn it forever, it’ll run out eventually, and I don’t think I can get you replacements or refills in here.”
The girl turned her glance down at the extinguished lighter in her palm, as if she was trying to come up with what exactly to say.
“...Thanks. I.. I really appreciate it.”
“No problem. Just leave it in here when you go out for recreation. You know how we are about you burning the place down, right?”
“Right, right, I know. I will. I promise.”
“Thank you, Blazz.”
“...Yeah. No problem. ...Could.. I go visit the library again?”
“You want to, now?”
“Yeah. Before dinner.”
“Sure. Let’s go.”
The caretaker stood up and opened the cell, while Blazz glanced down at the lighter. She stared at it for a moment before setting it down over on her table. And with that, she turned and headed out the door, following her caretaker.