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Vriska vs Sans

by comic

comic Luck and Light, Puzzles and Puns. Only one of these Megalovaniacs can win.
The crunch of snow is what alerted him. A lone sentry sat up slowly from his seat in the sentry station, slipper-covered feet resting up on the counter, which was littered with a few ketchup bottles. The skeleton opened one eye socket to look down the snowy path that led to the great purple door of the Ruins.

Nobody was there. So, he turned his gaze down the other way, expecting to see his brother, and instead…


“Really?”

There was a strange monster standing there in pajamas, giving Sans an incredulous look. Almost amused. “Wow.” She snickered as she folded her arms over her chest.

He hadn’t seen her around before, but he got around. Maybe somebody had pointed her in his direction or something of the sort. Her horns gave him an impression of a Goat Monster, like the King, but her horns were orange. Her skin was grey, eyes yellow, with spider-like fangs.

“sorry to disappoint?” Sans shrugged, grinning at her.

“Save your apologies. You're Sans, right? Name's Vriska Serket, and that's something you won't 8e forgetting.” She grinned at him. A grin that unnerved him in the most subtle way possible. Slowly, he removed his legs from the counter, knocking over an empty ketchup bottle in the process.


“Why's that, you're asking? Hah! It's 8ecause I'm on a quest across multiverses to defeat every 8adass in history. You're just first on my list and I'll admit, you're really disappointing me more than you realize. I knew I shouldn't have let Dave write this thing…”

Normally he’d try to write this off with a laugh, a pun or two, then call it a day. Now, however… he got the feeling she wasn’t just screwing with him. The way her eyes glinted with some kind of bloodlust…

As casually as possible, Sans got to his feet, and shoved his skeletal hands into the pockets of his moth-eaten blue hoodie. “alright, you got me.” He winked at her, shrugging. “just a disappointment, but it’s cool, i’m used to it.” The air felt tense. “don’t let me keep you any longer, kid. i’m sure we both have more important things to be doing, right?”


Vriska raised her hands, eight die bearing eight sides appearing between each of her fingers as her smile widened. “Scared? I've taken on Gods, so I wouldn't 8lame you if you were.”

Sans wasn’t sure how to reply to that. It seemed pretty clear that she was still looking to fight him, so he’d just have to… try and convince her otherwise? However, after a quick look at her, beyond the physical, it became evident she wasn’t bluffing.

“huh.” He cocked his head slightly to the side. “guess you’re not all bark. you’ve got some serious blood on your hands, kid.”

The world around them began to grow darker and darker as Sans closed his eyes, grin remaining plastered on his skeletal face. “you came here lookin’ for a fight, with me of all people. not sure what i’ve done to grant audience, but i suppose if you’re not gonna back down… then i have just one question for ya.”

She raised a brow, appearing bored at his monologue. She gave no response, so Sans finished his threat; “you feelin’ lucky?”


FIGHT

Vriska opened her mouth to reply, before a bone suddenly rammed through her back- and directly out her front. Her eyes widened in surprise before she collapsed to a knee, cobalt blood dripping onto the snow, spilling from her mouth with a cough. “You… idiot…” She sneered at him, before she collapsed onto the ground, unmoving.

Sans stared at the corpse for a moment, feeling something heavy weighing on his SOUL. It was the best possible outcome, he couldn’t risk this self-proclaimed killer of Gods to do anything to harm what monsterkind had spent so long building here. He still had a purpose here, and if she posed a threat to that…


His thoughts were interrupted as her body began to glow. Vriska levitated into the air, limbs hanging limply down. Before his eyes, the cerulean disappeared. The hole in her chest filled, closing over as though nothing had happened.

His eye sockets widened slightly as he watched, her own eyes flashing open as her confident smirk returned, and she dropped to the ground, immediately throwing her eight die to the ground, where they began to glow.

Planting himself on the spot, the light in Sans’ eyes disappeared. Somehow, some way… she’d come back.


Vriska flew toward Sans, throwing her fist out in an attempt to punch the skeleton. While he hadn’t been expecting her insane speed, a blink and you’ll miss it attack, he managed.

Appearing behind her, Sans winked. “what did you think was gonna happen? i’d just stand there and take it?” He swiped his hand through the air, and bones began to rain down from above. Vriska whirled on the spot, gritting her teeth as the die finally vanished, and granted their luck-


LOCK OF HEIRESS HAIR


Vriska groaned as a long lock of Meenah’s pre-Condesce hair appeared on the ground where the die had disappeared. She dove under the bones, weaving through more as they came down upon her, before she leaped up- and was suddenly slammed into the ground as a blue light enveloped her.

Grimacing, Vriska’s eyes darted toward Sans. He was grinning back at her, one socket dull and empty, the other flashing with a blue light as he used his magic. She felt his telekinetic powers drag her through the snow, and slam her against a tree.

Just as she was flung to the other side of the forest, she placed a hand on her forehead, projecting her sick mind control abilities.


The symbol of Scorpio appeared on Sans’ forehead, and the light of his eye immediately blinked out as his arm dropped to his side. She’d forced him asleep. Turning herself in the air, Vriska planted her boots against the tree she was being flung to- and kicked off it with enough force to shatter the tree behind her.

Zooming toward Sans, she reared her fist back for another strike, intent on letting this one land, only for her to swipe through air once again, and tumble to the snow as he appeared behind her once again, shaking his head. “sleep’s practically second nature for me, pal. but thanks, i needed the nap.” He winked.


Vriska paused, for just a moment. Now she was starting to get why Dave had suggested this guy. He seemed to be able to keep up with her, despite his deceiving appearance. This momentary hesitation on her end allowed the skeleton to launch another attack as the blue light enveloped her once again, and she was flung backward through the air- headed right for a maze of bones.

Gritting her teeth, her awesome butterfly wings began to rapidly flutter as she balled her hands into fists, and started to weave through the intricate puzzle. Sans seemed to start countering this, sending random bones to start punching straight into her path with the clear intent of impaling her as he had earlier.

She twirled her body past one of these, jerking her body to avoid another, before smashing her fist into a third, shattering the bone. It had been a lot tougher than she’d been expecting, making her hand sting as a fourth finally landed a hit.

It wasn’t enough to puncture through her, but enough to knock her off course into a platform that had appeared, which she proceeded to nearly roll off of. The blue aura had disappeared now, and Vriska found that she was trapped in the middle of a plethora of bones, and down the end she’d just come from… hovered a giant animalistic skull, its eyes glaring into her.


Climbing to her feet, Vriska’s wings fluttered in anticipation, her die appearing back between her fingers. This guy was tough- but she was tougher. Tossing her Fluorite Octet into the rows of bones below her, she sneered with a laugh. “You asked if I was feeling lucky. H8 to 8reak it to you, 'pal', 8ut…” She hovered into the air, staring down the Gaster Blaster as it opened its mouth, an orb of white light quickly swirling within- before a beam of intense energy fired out.


SUPER DOPE ENERGY SHIELD


The beam struck a barrier of energy powerful enough to negate the blast, cast by a gauntlet that had appeared on Vriska’s hand as she held it forward, a cocky smirk stretching across her face. The beam ceased its assault to reveal an untouched Vriska behind a shield of projected energy that had saved her from harm.

“I have all the luck. 8LL OF IT.”

Armed with her Super Dope Energy Shield, Vriska shot upward, placing the shield in front of her and breaking through the rows of bones trapping her inside. They met her head-on, punching downward only to shatter against her might as she broke through, rising high into the air, light swarming around her body as she went, sparkles darting off of the trail of pixie dust in her wake.

“So I have a 8etter question for you!” She yelled down to the forest beneath her as the bones all faded, leaving Sans standing in the clearing, staring up at her. “Think your luck will hold out? You 8etter hope so!” With that, she took off in a flash of light, her speed blindingly fast, the naked eye having no hope of catching her as she reared a fist back. Third time’s the charm.

This was it.


Bones were fired at her, all of which she weaved effortlessly around, nearing the skeleton- and striking.

Snow exploded in every direction as a small crater was formed, smoke rising from Vriska’s fist as she pulled it back, looking it over for a moment. No lasting damage, even if it was tingling like a 8itch.

Guess that was that. Dusting herself off, Vriska fluttered into the air, staring down for a moment. She’d been told ahead of time that Sans, like all of his kind, turned to dust once killed. Pretty lame, in Vriska’s opinion, that left no trophies to collect.

“forgetting something?”

She whirled on the spot, balling her fists as the unconcerned voice of the skeleton reached her ears- only for one of the Gaster Blasters to slam into her like a battering ram. She could feel a rib crack as she slammed into the snow, rolling along the trail for a moment in confusion. This was getting annoying.

Ready for Round 2, her wings fluttered and she prepared to take off- only for a beam of light to strike her, pummeling her deeper into the banks of snow, most of it melting around her. She hadn’t been able to activate the shield quick enough, and it was costing her.


Wincing as the beam finally relented, smoke rose from her now smoldering outfit of orange and yellow. The Thief of Light glared up in time to see more bones hurtling her way. Climbing to her feet, she prepared to take off once again, only for a bone to shoot up from the ground, piercing straight through her thigh.

With a cry of pain, Vriska yanked her leg, the bone breaking before it disappeared, leaving a gaping hole behind where cerulean blood began to pour out of. With little time to deal with the injury, Vriska soared upward, barely avoiding the bones as they slugged the ground where she’d just been standing. She hated to do it, but…

Grabbing one of the tail ends of her costume, she ripped it off and quickly wrapped her wound up as best as she could, still flying upward to the ceiling of the cavern. Bones whizzed by her, but the distance she’d covered made the attacks far less accurate.

“Okay…” She grimaced, glaring down. He was fast. Either that or he could teleport. Regardless, his reaction time was quick enough to match her speed. She hadn’t managed to land a single blow on him, and he’d already almost killed her a second time in what would have no doubt been a ‘Just’ death, resulting in her permanent demise.


Fluorite Octet appearing in her hands once again, she cast them down, light pouring out of her body into them, putting all the luck she had into getting the best roll possible. As soon as the die left her hands, another skull appeared directly in front of her, mouth opening and firing a quick beam.

Vriska weaved around it before activating her rad shield and blocking the blast of another Gaster Blaster that had appeared. Two wasn’t the end of it, however, as more began to appear in quick succession. One after the other, surrounding her from every angle.

Her smirk vanished, replaced by a scowl. Soaring higher and higher, she attempted to escape the amassing attack, but more continued to simply appear, all beginning to fire, columns of white-hot energy searing around her from all directions. She did her best to keep up, but there was simply too much.

The blasts began to strike her, consuming her in a temporary prison of energy and light.

Light…


Vriska stopped trying to flee, instead allowing each and every blast to consume her in their fiery inferno.

Sans stared up at the spectacle with empty eyes, the light show illuminating the entirety of the underground. Out of the corner of his eye socket, he saw the eight eight-sided die landing in a snow poff, glowing, then disappearing.


His grin diminished slightly as the Gaster Blasters all faded- but the light didn’t. Casting energy like the sun, Vriska hung in the air, body glowing so brightly it was nearly impossible to look directly at her. It was here that Sans recognized his mistake.

The Thief of Light had outplayed him.

This was about to get… ‘dicey’.


UNBREAKABLE KATANA


Vriska opened her eyes, staring down at the skeleton far beneath her. An ant atop a blanket of white. The katana of Dave’s bro appeared in her hand, the smirk returning. With the speed of light on her side, she shot downward for one final assault on the skeleton, body pulsing with blinding light.

All. The. Luck.

Maybe he didn’t learn his lesson. Or perhaps he was just attempting to delay the inevitable, but Gaster Blasters began to appear in her path, firing their beams at her. She simply passed through them, absorbing the light and heat before cutting each one in half with the sword, breaking them apart. In the blink of an eye, seven of the skulls had erupted in an explosion of light before she reached the ground.

She paused for only a moment. Not in hesitation, but to let her opponent get one last look at her. For him to see just who the fuck he was messing with.

“Game over.” She winked, before she appeared on the other side of him, katana in mid-swing. As soon as she’d moved, he too had, appearing at the other end of the clearing, grinning. A grin that lessened after a moment, his eye sockets widening as the Thief of Light turned to stare triumphantly at him.


Crimson leaked from a tear in his shirt- then through his jacket. His legs wobbled before he collapsed forward, the top half of his body separating from the lower half, which quickly vanished into dust.

“heh…” He coughed, red leaking slowly from his grinning mouth. Slowly, he looked over toward Vriska. “just... don’t hurt anyone else here… alright…?”

And he vanished.

Vriska stared at the spot for a moment, brow furrowing as the light around her began to diminish, her body naturally expelling most of the stored light and luck.

She’d won, but now, it felt… empty. She might have wanted this fight, but he clearly didn’t. His dying words had been for the people here. People he cared about. People that probably cared about him.


She lowered her gaze, feeling her gut twist. Now she just felt like an asshole. Pulling a device out of her back pocket, she pressed a large red button upon it (the only button on it), and a vortex appeared in front of her, casting one last glance behind her at the small pile of dust that lay dormant on the ground, she walked through the vortex, and disappeared.


Winner: Vriska Serket
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